February - March 2023 - Trains and ski huts - Germany and Switzerland
What is the connection between meditation, wine, and talking to strangers on a train?
In several philosophical conversations, sometimes with a glass of wine, friends and I circled around the questions of why we live, how to act upon the privileged situations we live in, and why we should care.
My Circle of influence
One fundamental learning in recent years was that I can only change my thoughts, actions, and perspective. I cannot change other people‘s behavior. I can only live upon my personal values. And maybe being kind to myself and to others will be an inspiration for others too. Maybe not, and that‘s fine too.
Franklin Covey‘s famous Circle of influence reminds me to stay with topics and challenges I can tackle. I can‘t change anything while complaining about „the system”, capitalism, or politics. I would rather work to change my day-to-day interactions and shape my thoughts and actions to make the world better than worse in my tiny sphere of influence.
A life well lived
Where to does meditation play into this? I’ve re-learned to feel and hear the signs of my body, my gut feeling, and intuition through meditation (remember the hours of being sore at the Vipassana course?). I‘ve learned to minimize my judgment of my body signs or thoughts and rather use them as feedback loops. Am I tired and need 12h sleep tonight? Do I need to address an issue that gives me a „bad“ stomach? The body is the best compass. It‘s just sometimes a bit hidden behind the loud voice of my mind that is louder than the whispers. That inner voice that knows what I would need to live a life well lived.
Synchronized with others
Best of all, listening to my inner voice, the calm and curious focus on the Now, further opened my eyes to human connections, those Yuanfen moments that were meant to be.
I had deep conversations with work colleagues over the Ski-weekend and felt that beautifully weird connectedness of the GFamily. Sitting on a train back from the Cologne Carnival, I met Adam, a teenager from Holland traveling to Switzerland with his guitar. On my way to Davos, I talked to Jörg, an older man on his way to a funeral. On both occasions, that connectedness only lasted a few minutes, yet I‘ll remember those conversations in the years to come.
In these moments, we truly synchronized our time. We stopped dwelling in the past or worrying about the future in our little minds by ourselves. Instead, we talked and listened. We learned and laughed. We controversially discussed and disagreed.
And these minutes, hours, and years spent together perfectly synchronized, building those connections across individuals, however fleeting or long-lasting, these moments are my gold dust.
They will stick with me long after those conversations end.
These human connections truly shape my personal definition of a life well lived.